To love someone wholly, and never see them aesthetically nor care too, yet never be able to express this emotion openly, is a catastrophic form of heartbreak that one must live with, with the only chance of freedom from this pain being the desired ones heartbreak. Less you can live with the joy of seeing them happy.
I haven’t seen Tobias in years. The last time I saw him he was heart broken over a girl he was set to marry, who in turn decided to sleep with her “best friend”. This woman, this girl, was the epitome of stereotypical bad girls. I’d like to think that the majority of us girls, though crazy, are loving enough to know a good man when we see one. Tobias. He’s one. He may be a bit slow towards women at first, but once you get to know him, he’s the best man I’ve ever tried to push onto any of my female friends. This is a guy who devotes his entire heart and soul to the woman he is with and to no other. You see, us girls, we have become the men we feared the most. The men that drug us along for the sake of having someone to come home too just so they could sleep around on us for sport. At some point, we decided that us girls should return that pain and heartache unto them and do to them what they did to us. You see, the problem with that, as with the problem that men in countered before us is, that though there are many women (or men) in the the world that are open to hurt us just for a piece of ass and a good time, there are twice as many that just want to love us for who we are and be in a relationship with us and give us the love we deserve. At some point, the paradigm has shifted and the women of the world have taken over the role as the “bad seed” in the relationship and can no longer be trusted. Us girls, we need to just let go and allow the men of today to just say “I like you” and be happy with that. We may get hurt, but how are we to know they won’t get hurt as much or more? If someone is willing to attempt to show an interest in you then let them have their way for a short period and see what they have to offer. What harm can be done by letting someone try. So they might not be the most attractive at first, but after they prove themselves they might be far more attractive than they seemed at first. A simple law of life that should have been discovered many ages ago is, give people the benefit of a doubt and let them try before shifting them out and shooting them down.
There are few things in life that have a more harrowing effect on the mind, than heartbreak. Ms. Kyle is one of the more recent victims of this torturous treason. Ms. Kyle was in love; well, is in love. See, the most agonizing aspect that corresponds with heartbreak, is that sudden realization that the one you love, does not love you, in return. This realization is what drags many into the vast undertow that is depression, the depths of which many do not return from. Most have the perseverance to emerge from these depths and once again bask in the prosperous and pleasant rays of what life and the possibility of future love have to offer. But others never emerge, they simply drown unmercifully into the darkest fathoms of their own hearts and minds, never to be seen again, trapped within their own hell. Ms. Kyle is currently fighting the currents of this malicious curse, in an attempt to return to her former self, before she made contact with the disordered malefactor that tossed her unwanted heart out to sea. Ms. Kyle is struggling to tread the waters, desperately wishing for a single gasp of air or a single glimmer of light to guide her back to the surface. At this point, some will lose the will to live, while others, such as Ms. Kyle, will see that glimmer like the beacon of a lighthouse and let it guide her back to sanctuary. There will be numerous trials along the way, such as copious amounts of memories bombarding your every waking moment and thought. Ms. Kyle, specifically, remembers the countless moments of escape to a Wonderland of maddening infatuation that she endured as she fell into the abysmal rabbit hole of her former lovers eyes. Because of this memoir of a better, benevolent and content period of Ms. Kyle’s life, she will forever be mistrustful of diving into the gaze of another love interest. It is this act of judging all future love interests by the actions of one past love that some learn from, while others unintentionally enclose themselves off to love. Ms. Kyle deeply wishes not to be included in the later group. Ms. Kyle wishes for her heart to forever remain open to the thought and tangibility of love. It is this fortitude of her heart that will keep her afloat on her journey back to shore. This same fortitude, this firm grip of self, is what saves the many from drowning. Ms. Kyle will survive this story, and some day, she will once again fall smitten to yet another suitor. And her one piece of advice that she will offer to all others faced with the bloodthirsty currents of heartbreak, “Learn to swim.”
There is nothing you can do for which I will not forgive you.